So, we’ve wrapped up the year 2022, but not all of 2022 business.
As part of the process to say goodbye to 2022, I’m sharing the films that received the lowest ratings in the past 12 months. As usual, while most years have plenty of good movies, there are those that go in the opposite direction.
Here’s the ranking for 2022.
10. Bullet Train
“Bullet Train” was a movie just over two hours, but it felt more like a three. It’s an exhausting experience with a convoluted story and dialogue that was written to sound as edgy as possible.
The writing, and the violent action, makes the film reminiscent of a Quentin Tarantino project, but the wit, cohesiveness and any depth is sorely missing. This is an example of a movie trying way too hard and still not succeeding in any department.
It’s not funny, and the characters are all awfully forgettable so there’s little feeling of consequence with the action.
9. Strange World
Disney’s animation studio had a great run of success for just over a decade but that came to a screeching halt in November with the release of the exceptionally bland “Strange World.” It’s an animated feature completely dull, with little life or passion to make it a memorable experience.
The characters and story are completely generic, as a viewer can telegraph what’s going to happen with the adventure and how relationship strife will be resolved.
The animation looked okay, certainly vibrant, but there was a lot of weird looking creatures and terrain in the film. Yes it’s a strange world, but all of the weird things like a sentient goo blob makes it seem like the filmmakers were dangling keys to the audience.
8. Firestarter
I never watched the 1984 adaptation of the Stephen King novel, but I have to imagine it was handled better than it was in this film. The concept certainly isn’t a bad one but the execution is really rough with this.
It’s a film with a lot of things happening, but very little is actually happening. Protagonists go on their adventure while the antagonists plot and scheme. However, in terms of character arcs and narrative development, the well is dry.
7. Blacklight
In 2022, Liam Neeson was in two action films getting a major release. One, “Memory,” was not too bad. The other, “Blacklight,” was just bad. The script is so dated and dull that one would think it’s been sitting in a filing cabinet for more than a decade.
Neeson seemed to phone this one in, the characters featured are one dimensional and the action is rather weak. A simple car chase and some forgettable shootouts are all that’s included.
6. Hotel Transylvania: Transformania
The “Hotel Transylvania” series started strong but each entry has been worse than the last, and it hit rock bottom in 2022. The fourth installment feels like just a rehash of the previous entries, with Dracula still mistrusting Johnny, and Johnny wanting to impress his father-in-law.
We’ve covered this territory before. Do something different. Maybe have Johnny become more serious and less fun-loving as he begins to run the hotel, showing he’s becoming like Drac. Something new, rather than what’s already been done. Unfortunately, viewers had nothing original with this movie.
5. Babylon
A whole three hours of director Damien Chazelle throwing everything he can at the screen to show how crazy and wild old Hollywood was. That’s what “Babylon” pretty much is. It may have been fine if Chazelle was only making an all-out comedy, but Chazelle tries to balance it with drama, and it doesn’t work at all.
Not only is the tone off, but the film also feels like it’s lacking in substance, as Chazelle is trying to go for so much style instead. It’s so over the top that it becomes exhausting, and ends up being an unsatisfying watch.
4. The Invitation
The last 20 minutes or so of “The Invitation” were actually pretty entertaining. Had the whole movie been like that, it might have been alright. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.
The film has the audience sit through a whole lot of nothing before anything really happens. It felt like waiting until the third act for an inciting incident to happen.
Thrills and suspense is kept from the audience while melodrama more suitable for a Lifetime TV movie takes place.
3. Morbius
“Morbius” was a wasted opportunity. A chance to make a dark, moody film squandered. This film does the bare minimum, using a paint-by-numbers story and slapping grayscale on it.
Films like “The Crow,” “Blade” and 1989’s “Batman” showed how good comic book adaptations can be with a dark, Gothic aesthetic. But the filmmakers here didn’t even seem to try to give the picture any style.
On top of that, the acting seems phoned in, the characters are one-dimensional and the action looks so blurry that a viewer can’t tell what’s going on. Not to mention it’s just PG-13, so there can’t even be blood in a vampire movie.
2. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (22)
The latest “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” plays out like a generic slasher movie, when, as the franchise has shown, it should be anything but. Not that any of the sequels have been any good, but they at least tried something different and had some weirdness with Leatherface.
In this film, Leatherface is awakened and goes on a spree not that different from any other slasher villain. Even the 2013 “Massacre” movie, which I thought was awful, at least had new idea related to the franchise’s family element.
Also the film seems to want to comment on Gen Z and millennials because of how social media is used. It’s honestly really lame and doesn’t work with a villain like Leatherface. It’s better suited for a Freddy Krueger or Ghostface type character.
It doesn’t even work as a gore-flick, as it’s all done in fake-looking CGI. Plus, the film basically wrecks the Sally character from the first one.
1. Bodies Bodies Bodies
This movie was absolutely unbearable. The characters were all terrible, so a viewer doesn’t care about their safety. The deaths aren’t often shown in graphic detail, so it’s not like there are entertaining kills or frightening moments, so there’s no reason to be on the edge of one’s seat.
Additionally, it’s fine to have a movie feature some topical themes and banter, but “Bodies” does it with zero subtlety or wit. It’s basically just “haha, Gen Z, am I right?” Lame.
The film is listed as a comedy, thriller and horror on the Internet Movie Database. However, it’s annoying, not funny. It’s boring, not thrilling, and there’s no horror to be found. It’s a miserable film to watch that offers nothing enjoyable to an audience.
Matthew Liedke on Film 
We don’t have any matches! To be fair, I haven’t seen a lot of these. Bullet Train ended up on my preliminary “best” list at the moment, I just had so much fun with it. I didn’t love Bodies Bodies Bodies either and completely forgot about Morbius.
LikeLike