Category: Reviews

Director:
Anthony Bell, Ben Gluck
Cast:
Justin Long
Hayden Panettiere
Dennis Hopper
Danny Glover
Viki Lewis
Chris Carmack
Larry Miller
Eric Price
Rated: PG

Here is a film that is basically all that is wrong with animated films for kids.

The film follows Humphrey (Long), a wolf who is an ‘omega,’ one of the lower level wolves. Humphrey’s good friend, though, who he also has his heart set on, Kate, is an ‘alpha’ and the daughter of the leader of the clan which unfortunately means that the two can’t be together because of the laws that the wolves have.

Another reason why it’s impossible for the two to be together is that Kate must marry the son of the leader of a rival wolf clan. The son is named Garth (Carmack), but before Kate and Garth can meet to get to know each other, Kate and Humphrey are tranquilized and taken to a different wild life preserve. So now the two must get back to their home and at the same time, Humphrey has to try to win Kate’s heart before they get back.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Alpha and Omega’”

From the mind of M. Night… Sigh.

The film follows Detective Bowden (Messina) who is investigating a suicide in a skyscraper. Meanwhile, we also have five characters, all strangers, enter an elevator in the same building. It first just appears to be a simple ride up to the top, but the elevator is soon stopped.

At first the situation seems like just a simple technical glitch, yet as time goes on the workers begin to notice that there is nothing technically  wrong with the elevator and the problem may be supernatural, with the character Ramirez (Vargas) jumping straight to the conclusion of it being the Devil. Bowden at first denies this, but as time goes on and the people in the elevator start turning on each other, plus with no one being able to get to the people in the elevator, he starts to see it as more and more possible.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Devil’”

Director:
Paul W.S. Anderson
Cast:
Milla Jovovich
Ali Larter
Kim Coates
Wentworth Miller
Shawn Roberts
Spencer Locke
Rated: R

The franchise keeps spinning on its downward spiral.

Once again Milla Jovovich returns as the character Alice, and in case you forgot what happened in the past three movies, Alice does the same narration she did in the previous two films. It starts off in Tokyo, with the evil Umbrella Corporation held up in a base underground.

However, it is soon invaded by Alice and her clones who now have super powers after experiments done in the previous film. This cliffhanger plot point of the third movie is immediately done away with, though, as Alice looses all of the clones in an explosion and her powers through some plot device.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Resident Evil Afterlife’”

Director:
Nanette Burstein
Cast:
Drew Barrymore
Justin Long
Charlie Day
Jason Sudeikis
Christina Applegate
Rated: R

The film follows Garret, played by Justin Long, a man who can’t seem to stay in a committed relationship. Meanwhile, Erin, played by Drew Barrymore, is working at a summer internship at a New York City newspaper. After both our lead characters have a bad day they both decide to go out to the bar. After meeting by an arcade game the two hit it off and start a good relationship.

However, their relationship becomes strained as Erin has to return to San Francisco after her time at the internship is over. The two want to continue in their relationship, though, and decide to go long distance dating.Yet while it seemed easy at first, jobs and other events show them that being in love across the country is more difficult than they thought.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Going the Distance’”

Director:
Anton Corbijn
Cast:
George Clooney
Violante Placido
Johan Leysen
Thekla Reuten
Paolo Bonacelli
Rated: R

Anyone going into this film expecting just an average spy film will be quite surprised with this film.

The movie follows the character Jack (Clooney), a man who appears to be a sort of spy or hit man. We start with him in an isolated cabin with his lover, Ingrid played by Irina Björklund. Things seem to be going fine until some assassins come out to kill Jack. Jack eliminates the assassins, but in the process, Irina is killed. After the event, Jack goes to Rome to meet his employer, Pavel (Leysen). Pavel informs him that the killings are in the media and he needs to go underground for a while in a small town, and while there finish a final job that doesn’t involve any deaths.

After arriving in the town, Jack meets with the client for the job he was given named Mathilde (Reuten). His task is to construct a powerful sniper rifle. Jack gets to work on the rifle, but still has time to explore the small town and make acquaintances with the priest, Father Benedetto (Bonacelli). Additionally, he begins a relationship with a prostitute named Clara (Placido). Yet he can’t get too comfortable, because he eventually finds out that the town isn’t as safe as he thought.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘The American’”

Director:
John Luessenhop
Cast:
Chris Brown
Hayden Christensen
Matt Dillon
Steve Harris
T.I.
Rated: PG-13

Takers follows a group of very highly trained robbers who have been doing their ‘job’ for years now and are nearly always succeed at what they do.

However, one of the team members, Ghost (T.I.) was in prison for a long time and is finally getting out. He meets the team after their latest heists and offers them an opportunity at a lot of cash. Meanwhile we have Matt Dillon’s character Jack Welles, a police officer who is hot on the team’s tail and is getting ready to catch them.

Despite being advertised as more of a heist film, there aren’t exactly many heists going on. Instead, “Takers” plays out like a ‘Fast and Furious’ robbery picture, a rather dull one at that. There is one robbery operation that is permitted in the film, but it is so over the top and ridiculous that it becomes laughable.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Takers’”

Director:
Daniel Stamm
Cast:
Patrick Fabian
Ashley Bell
Iris Bahr
Louis Herthum
Caleb Landry Jones
Rated: PG-13

This movie had me so hooked… And then the ending happened.

In this film, we follow the character Cotton Marcus (Fabian), a man who grew up in the deep south and raised around religion with a family history of doing exorcisms. However, the one thing that sets him apart, is that Cotton doesn’t actually believe in the exorcisms he’s doing. He realizes they are fake and because of this he decides to have a documentary crew come with him on his next and last exorcism to expose it.

Him and his crew go out to the first exorcism request he picks up, which is at a family farm in a rural area. Upon arrival, he meets the father Louis (Herthum) and his strange son Caleb (Landry Jones). Yet the main person that needs help is the daughter Nell (Bell) who appears to be possessed. At first Cotton seems to think that it is nothing more than imaginary, but as time passes and the situation intensifies things start to look more real.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘The Last Exorcism’”

Director:
Alexandre Aja
Cast:
Steven McQueen
Ving Rhames
Elisabeth Shue
Christopher Lloyd
Jerry O’Connell
Eli Roth
Rated: R

Bring on the campiness!

The film is about, you guessed it, piranhas killing people, exactly as advertised, but let’s get into the ‘plot.’ The film takes place in a small lake town in Arizona. It’s spring time and the lake is a huge attraction to college kids out on their break.

With all this going on, we enter our lead, Jake (McQueen) who is by the lake admiring everything going on and ends up meeting a beautiful woman named Danni (Kelly Brooks). After this happening he find’s out she is a model for a ‘Girl’s Gone Wild’ like photographer named Derrick (O’Connell) who after some talking gets Jake to take them out on the lake for a photo shoot.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Piranha 3D’”

Director:
Paul W.S. Anderson
Cast:
Milla Jovovich
Ali Larter
Kim Coates
Wentworth Miller
Shawn Roberts
Spencer Locke
Rated: R

The franchise keeps spinning on its downward spiral.

Once again Milla Jovovich returns as the character Alice, and in case you forgot what happened in the past three movies, Alice does the same narration she did in the previous two films. It starts off in Tokyo, with the evil Umbrella Corporation held up in a base underground.

However, it is soon invaded by Alice and her clones who now have super powers after experiments done in the previous film. This cliffhanger plot point of the third movie is immediately done away with, though, as Alice looses all of the clones in an explosion and her powers through some plot device.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘Resident Evil Afterlife’”

Director:
Sylvester Stallone
Cast:
Sylvester Stallone
Jason Statham
Jet Li
Dolph Lundgren
Eric Roberts
Randy Couture
Steve Austin
Rated: R

There are many movies that build a ton of hype for themselves, yet few can live up to it. The Expendables is a movie where it doesn’t just live up to the hype, but exceeds it.

The film follows a mercenary team called the Expendables, which is lead by Barney Ross (Stallone). Things get started during a mission on a ship where it shows just how skilled this team is.

Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘The Expendables’”